To whom it may represent,
Have you ever worked so hard in your life only to find out it still wasn’t enough for others? I have been toiling with the mental weight of trying to be enough for people that I care about, yet only find myself slowly diminishing. My beliefs and values were altered, and even my love for God became a projection of spirituality. I warped the very internal frame that made me successful. I thought I was living in success because of how I sacrificed. Have you ever given so much that you eventually gave nothing?
I found myself experiencing secondary trauma…burnout, compassion fatigue, and moral distress. I found myself giving into others’ abusive and manipulative behavior out of fear of feeling vulnerable. I created defense mechanisms to go on autopilot because I knew what people needed to ignore me. There comes a time in everyone’s life when they can no longer walk the path of delusions or false beliefs. I am recovering from a prideful journey and tasting how flavorless the lust of success really is. Has your self-care become a response or reaction to your stress?
I found that fear has been pushed away more than it should of. I should have welcomed the wisdom of fear and learned what insight fear had to offer. As I become more connected to my body, I sense my reactions as a decision, not triggers. My ability to decide for myself has become more apparent than ever. It is not the journey or destination I seek but the company I confide in. I hope this letter creates a space that helps you feel accountable for your needs and know that a moment of discomfort is worth the value of your dreams.
Be kind to yourself so Love can work in you.
Heal All Ways,
– Dr. William Washington